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anythingbutgreyBe Still, Heart
or: five girls with ex-boyfriend issues.
(Dee, Claire, Bella, Marian, Hermione)
She never calls again, turns toward the sun setting in the west, the end of something.
thanks to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fiannan for the beta and deadduck008 for letting me steal this multi-fandom idea from her brain (five days)
01. Anastasia "Dee" Dualla
She keeps a picture of Billy in a drawer between pages of scripture she knows Lee won’t touch, pins another on the wall as a consequence of war.
But his death (she still swallows at the word) is not a consequence of war but a consequence of her.
After nightmares, she tells Lee she dreams only of Cylons and fire. He doesn’t ask about those – everyone has them now.
Billy sighs behind her eyelids, Oh, Dee.
02. Claire Bennet
No, they weren’t dating, but Zach’s in her heart, it’s close enough, and he won’t leave.
She never even got to say goodbye. Not that he would understand, his memories washed away by the wind (or other, more human means), but it would have been worth something. She knows he would have nodded, solemn, arms around her and “I’ll miss you. I don’t know why, but I’ll miss you.”
So she calls him to hear him pick up the phone with a small “Hello?” from different pay phones, but one day the phone rings and, instead of a greeting, she gets – “Claire, come home.”
She never calls again, turns toward the sun setting in the west, the end of something.
03. Bella Swan
Tally marks tick off in her brain until the wedding, and it’s a good thing Alice doesn’t sleep because otherwise things wouldn’t be done in time.
Some nights, the moments before she falls asleep, she almost wishes for Jacob to come home and sweep her away. Then she can pretend it’s just her mind running away with things and she doesn’t mean it, just like she never meant, when Edward pulled her from her car that last night with Jacob, that there was part of her that yearned for Jacob’s arms instead. She never meant it.
She looks for him at the wedding, and can’t see him. But she has always been better at feeling him than seeing him, closes her eyes and breathes deep.
No, he’s not there. But he still feels her.
Be happy, she hears him whisper, opens her eyes and pretends they are shining with joy.
She’ll spend eternity wishing he had been there; he’ll spend his (too short, she’ll think, no matter if he lives to 60 or 102) life happy he wasn’t present – he never would have changed anything.
She knew that too.
04. Maid Marian
A yes sits on her tongue and on the fingers of her left hand. She can’t help but wonder, though, the images of last time we tried this painted in her mind. She still winces at the memory of herself in a frozen pile on the floor.
There’s last time and there’s this time and she hopes for something different.
Hope is a scary thing. He taught her that.
05. Hermione Granger
She stops thinking Harry will wake up (eventually) the day she spots him on one knee in front of Ginny in the park.
Ginny’s hand flies to her mouth; Hermione’s to her throat.
Later, she won’t be surprised at the motions of their hands, and threads hers through Ron’s hair instead of simply staring at her fingers for hours.
He laughs against her mouth, “Nice to see you too.”
But in her head Ron whispers I love you and she trains her mind to say it back.
*
feedback?
or: five girls with ex-boy
(Dee, Claire, Bella, Marian, Hermione)
She never calls again, turns toward the sun setting in the west, the end of something.
thanks to
fiannan for the beta and deadduck008 for letting me steal this multi-fandom idea from her brain (five days)01. Anastasia "Dee" Dualla
She keeps a picture of Billy in a drawer between pages of scripture she knows Lee won’t touch, pins another on the wall as a consequence of war.
But his death (she still swallows at the word) is not a consequence of war but a consequence of her.
After nightmares, she tells Lee she dreams only of Cylons and fire. He doesn’t ask about those – everyone has them now.
Billy sighs behind her eyelids, Oh, Dee.
02. Claire Bennet
No, they weren’t dating, but Zach’s in her heart, it’s close enough, and he won’t leave.
She never even got to say goodbye. Not that he would understand, his memories washed away by the wind (or other, more human means), but it would have been worth something. She knows he would have nodded, solemn, arms around her and “I’ll miss you. I don’t know why, but I’ll miss you.”
So she calls him to hear him pick up the phone with a small “Hello?” from different pay phones, but one day the phone rings and, instead of a greeting, she gets – “Claire, come home.”
She never calls again, turns toward the sun setting in the west, the end of something.
03. Bella Swan
Tally marks tick off in her brain until the wedding, and it’s a good thing Alice doesn’t sleep because otherwise things wouldn’t be done in time.
Some nights, the moments before she falls asleep, she almost wishes for Jacob to come home and sweep her away. Then she can pretend it’s just her mind running away with things and she doesn’t mean it, just like she never meant, when Edward pulled her from her car that last night with Jacob, that there was part of her that yearned for Jacob’s arms instead. She never meant it.
She looks for him at the wedding, and can’t see him. But she has always been better at feeling him than seeing him, closes her eyes and breathes deep.
No, he’s not there. But he still feels her.
Be happy, she hears him whisper, opens her eyes and pretends they are shining with joy.
She’ll spend eternity wishing he had been there; he’ll spend his (too short, she’ll think, no matter if he lives to 60 or 102) life happy he wasn’t present – he never would have changed anything.
She knew that too.
04. Maid Marian
A yes sits on her tongue and on the fingers of her left hand. She can’t help but wonder, though, the images of last time we tried this painted in her mind. She still winces at the memory of herself in a frozen pile on the floor.
There’s last time and there’s this time and she hopes for something different.
Hope is a scary thing. He taught her that.
05. Hermione Granger
She stops thinking Harry will wake up (eventually) the day she spots him on one knee in front of Ginny in the park.
Ginny’s hand flies to her mouth; Hermione’s to her throat.
Later, she won’t be surprised at the motions of their hands, and threads hers through Ron’s hair instead of simply staring at her fingers for hours.
He laughs against her mouth, “Nice to see you too.”
But in her head Ron whispers I love you and she trains her mind to say it back.
*
feedback?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 05:14 pm (UTC)KILLLLLS MEEEE. WHY WON'T YOU WRITE MORE H/HR?
Open wound, PAIN.
But in her head Ron whispers I love you and she trains her mind to say it back.
It's true, it's completely true. I love your Claire too, with pay phones and memories. It's funny how memory is such a huge part of that show, oh Zach.
Hee, I love seeing your other characterizations even though I cannot completely understand 1 and 4 - THEY STILL HAVE PRETTY WORDS!
asdf;lkjasdfj; I love multi-fandom. And you ♥
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Date: 2007-12-10 05:53 pm (UTC)KILLLLLS MEEEE. WHY WON'T YOU WRITE MORE H/HR?
Open wound, PAIN.
IA, IA, IAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
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Date: 2007-12-10 05:16 pm (UTC)You poor, poor girl. I will forever be convinced that should've just ran away to Fiji and stayed there. Married some hot co-ed or something rather.
Lovely, bb.
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Date: 2007-12-10 05:53 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-12-10 05:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 06:04 pm (UTC)that's all
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Date: 2007-12-10 05:59 pm (UTC)No, he’s not there. But he still feels her.
sigh. you slay me.
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Date: 2007-12-10 07:52 pm (UTC)h/hr
Date: 2007-12-10 06:04 pm (UTC)Re: h/hr
Date: 2007-12-10 08:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 06:15 pm (UTC)Damn you for killing me. I just...I have never really liked Dee because of Billy's accusation "you should have told me about THIS" and I agreed with him, but I never really considered that she might feel guilty. So now you have me sympathizing with a character I never thought it possible for. I bet she can't look Roslin in the eyes.
Also, your R/M was awesome, this line: A yes sits on her tongue and on the fingers of her left hand. flows so nicely.
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Date: 2007-12-10 07:07 pm (UTC)glad you liked it, bb!
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Date: 2007-12-10 07:00 pm (UTC)My favorite quote from the J/B part:
"She looks for him at the wedding, and can’t see him. But she has always been better at feeling him than seeing him, closes her eyes and breathes deep.
No, he’s not there. But he still feels her.
Be happy, she hears him whisper, opens her eyes and pretends they are shining with joy.
She’ll spend eternity wishing he had been there; he’ll spend his life happy he wasn’t present – he never would have changed anything.
She knew that too."
So true and so devastating... cruel reality...
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Date: 2007-12-10 07:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 07:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 07:52 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2007-12-10 08:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 08:10 pm (UTC)or you could convert.i know, i know. eventually.
dinner at j street, bb?
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Date: 2007-12-10 08:21 pm (UTC)So lovely. It even made me sympathize with Hermione /Harry which I never really considered before. I knew it was out there and was a possibility but I was always in the Ron/Hermione camp.
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Date: 2007-12-10 08:25 pm (UTC)and i made you consider h/hr! WIN.
glad you liked it, bb.
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Date: 2007-12-10 08:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 08:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 09:15 pm (UTC)OWWWW MY SOOOUL ;______;!
There’s last time and there’s this time and she hopes for something different.
Ginny’s hand flies to her mouth; Hermione’s to her throat.
Elyssa/Words, that's all I'm saying =).
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Date: 2007-12-10 10:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 09:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 10:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 10:58 pm (UTC)01. I can just see all of this happening in Dee's mind--it works on every level. And this line: Billy sighs behind her eyelids, Oh, Dee. just broke my heart. Lovely and heartbreaking.
02. Oh, Zach. How I miss you. How tragic that Claire (and the fans) never got a goodbye.
She knows he would have nodded, solemn, arms around her and “I’ll miss you. I don’t know why, but I’ll miss you.” Yes. That's exactly what he would have done.
“Claire, come home.” That line just demolished me.
03. I've only read the first book, but I always felt that if I continued with the series, I would be Team Jacob. And this just solidified for me why that is.
She’ll spend eternity wishing he had been there; he’ll spend his (too short, she’ll think, no matter if he lives to 60 or 102) life happy he wasn’t present – he never would have changed anything. Perfect line. I love it.
04. A yes sits on her tongue and on the fingers of her left hand. Another perfect line.
Hope is a scary thing. He taught her that. This one gave me goosebumps.
05. I'm not so much for the Harry/Hermione-ness, but this was very, very well written, so I approve.
She stops thinking Harry will wake up (eventually) the day she spots him on one knee in front of Ginny in the park. Very nice line.
Again, the whole thing is lovely and effective.
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Date: 2007-12-11 12:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 11:06 pm (UTC)write more, please.
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Date: 2007-12-11 12:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-10 11:11 pm (UTC)Dee - I remember being so angry when they killed Billy, and the way it was just kind of overlooked after that. Maybe I would have sympathized a little more for Dee if they had given us some insight into her remorse the way you did. lol
Marian - A yes sits on her tongue and on the fingers of her left hand. Yes yes yes! I don't think I've ever enjoyed reading a character's POV more than I love reading into Marian's thoughts. You've captured her perfectly!
Hermione - OMG. Can we say ANGST? I think this was my favorite one, mainly because I've never really had any specific hatred against Ron/Hermione or Harry/Ginny...except for the pure and simple fact that they're not, and never could be Harry/Hermione. I love that you completely summed up my feelings on the trio love triangle in 5 sentences! So good!
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Date: 2007-12-11 12:17 am (UTC)i have little to no sympathy for dee -- the only time i felt bad for him was in s3 when she knew about kara and lee. but since billy she's been on my shit list.
glad you liked it!
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Date: 2007-12-10 11:40 pm (UTC)but the last made me want to read Harry/Ginny, too!no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 12:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 12:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 12:33 am (UTC)glad you like the fic, bb. :D
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Date: 2007-12-11 12:33 am (UTC)I am not familiar with the three first fandoms, but I think these fragments work on their own very well. The scenes create echoes of the story, the words in between the lines.
You describe Marian beautifully; the terrible dreamer's hope overcoming her, and the memories haunting her.
And Hermione, oh god. It stings.
Thank you. Your writing has sharp, crystalline beauty to it.
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Date: 2007-12-11 12:35 am (UTC)oh, i didn't realize you had friended me! i must have missed your comment. i'll add you now! sorry about that.
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Date: 2007-12-11 02:52 am (UTC)and marian. marian! my heart aches for her. he's finally back and everything goes to hell immediately. she has the worst luck ever =(
and hermione's piece... it really broke my heart. especially this: Ginny’s hand flies to her mouth; Hermione’s to her throat. it was so evocative! i loved the whole hands theme. and good (or bad? *blinks*) hermione can control her emotions-- if i had been her, my hands would've flown to harry's throat, who cares if he was in the middle of a proposal or not. because honestly, talk about blind >.< but this was great. anyway, how about a happier piece next time around? this fandom needs more fluff, let me tell you... =3
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Date: 2007-12-11 03:01 am (UTC)then LMAO i loved the whole hands theme. and good (or bad? *blinks*) hermione can control her emotions-- and agreeing with you
then
LMAO again if i had been her, my hands would've flown to harry's throat, who cares if he was in the middle of a proposal or not. because honestly, talk about blind
then
completely agreeing with stupid JKR and Harry that matter. We all know Hermione rocks and was the soul of those books, if only she had been allowed to develop
imagine Harry would not be blind would have stopped whinning and Hermione and him would have saved the world with her running the show of course..cause only Harry really appreciates her gifts *sighhhhs* for fans and Hermione
how about a happier piece next time around? this fandom needs more fluff, let me tell you...
Sorry cut and paste hates me! Grrr!
From:no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 03:16 am (UTC)You've captured Robin/Marian relationship so well and the H/Hr = love. ( It's funny how most people write it from Hermion's point of view ).
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Date: 2007-12-11 03:34 am (UTC)Yup..well she is the brains and the soul while Harry is the blind heart. Although I read a really good one from Harry's perspective yesturday. I also read a great one that went back and forth between their POV's. I think it happens from Hermione's POV so much because again she is the soul of Harry and the books and she is just so complex. Layers upon layers. Once Harry realizes he loves her we know why..because he is already in love with her just blind.
Which is why i find moments like when she kisses his check in book 4 from his perspective to not be unique because most of the books are from his, but he mentions that and it basically ends book 4...hmm...JKR was just silly...and blind
neither Harry or JKR paid enough attention to Hermione.
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Date: 2007-12-11 03:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 03:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 10:42 am (UTC)I love the Hermoine one, that was definitely my favourite.
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Date: 2007-12-11 10:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 11:03 am (UTC)OMG THE AWESOMNESS!*_____*
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Date: 2007-12-11 10:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-11 05:24 pm (UTC)Just lovely.
And the Hermione one was really interesting too. :)
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Date: 2007-12-11 10:14 pm (UTC)